Here are some things I learned about surviving when the well runs dry.
- Recognize the Adversary. According to I Peter 5:8, we have an adversary who seeks to devour us. Satan’s strategy is seen throughout the Scriptures – to strike shepherds and scatter the sheep. For instance, he assaulted Timothy with insecurity and inadequacy. I was Timothy. Satan harassed me with thoughts: You’re a failure. You’re a terrible pastor. Your aren’t gifted enough. The church would be better off without you. You’ve missed your calling. They hounded my mind continually, and I began to believe them. Then I had to trust that He would equip and enable me to get the job done. I went to the Scriptures that speak of endurance and perseverance. Deep down I knew I had to press on, and God would see me through. He did. I’m thankful I didn’t quit.
- Settle the Commitment Issue. Another breakthrough came by committing myself anew to the call of pasturing. Discouragement caused me to entertain ideas of quitting the ministry and focusing to my medical professions. Mentally I packed my bags daily. The fantasies provided brief oases in my desert, but ultimately they sucked me down into deeper depression. Indecision frustrated and complicated my state of mind. I became angry that the ministry forced me to say “No” to other options. Then Jesus’ words began to impress my thoughts, “Whosoever wishes to save his life shall lose it; but whoever loses his life for My sake shall find it.” (Matt. 16:25). I was trying to save my life. Leaving the ministry would be a cop-out and would cost me long-term blessings and character development. Therefore, I determined to stick with it and be faithful to the call. Even if it killed me, I would give myself to the ministry. It was a turning point. The distracting, conflicting desires faded. Contentment came, followed by genuine joy.
- Help From Others. Another turning point came when my wife and I sought counsel. We had talked about the need to seek help, but I was reluctant to bother others with my problems. So I kept putting it off. That week we made an appointment with Pastora Lucila and Brother Henry. As I spilled the sewage of my soul, they listened with nodding heads. Although they didn’t tell me anything I hadn’t already heard, being able to unburden my mind gave birth to a new perspective. Having the prayer and emotional support of others has effected definite change in my life.
- Distinguish Between Yourself and Your Ministry. I learned, however, that such sharing needed some boundaries. I had to learn to confine the situation to its appropriate territory, including disciplining my thoughts during off-hours. Resisting the temptation to discuss matters at home, and developing a pattern of prayer that focused on personal and family issues rather than church business.
- Keep the Momentum. Each of these disciplines has served as underground water sources to replenish my well – nothing spectacular by themselves, but together they’ve provided refreshment to me and to those I pastor. They don’t change circumstances or shelter me from problems; however, as I maintain them as an ongoing part of my life, they bring me into contact with God’s strength – the only reliable well from which to draw.